Hi Everyone,

Happy New Year!

Welcome to 2019! I hope this Holiday season is full of fun, good health and love for you and that this new year moves you closer to fulfilment and happiness.

Here is a little story for you. I was recently in an Uber and struck up a conversation with the driver after she hung up from a call with her daughter. She told me that, of her 4 daughters, this one was the only one that had gone to study in China and was learning Mandarin. This was a dream that she had always had for her children and she was disappointed that only one of her four was ‘fulfilling’ her dream for them.

As the conversation continued, she also told me that she had always dreamed that her children would play an instrument, as she loved music, yet none of her girls had any interest in this. I asked her if she wanted her life filled with music, could she not learn to play music, herself? She told me that she once played guitar but gave it up to raise her family and that despite her children being adults, every day she sacrifices her time by cooking meals for her girls and drives Uber part-time in order to financially help them. This, she said, leaves her no time for ‘selfish’ things, such as pursuing interests that would make her happy.

Why am I telling you this? Well, many of us feel the pressure of  social or cultural expectations placed on us. In addition, many of us, often without realising, project our dreams, hopes and expectations onto others (especially our children). Being stuck in either of these situations means that we are not living for ourselves, or fulfilling our individual purpose. Carl Jung, the brilliant psychoanalyst, talked about “individuation” as the pinnacle of human attainment. He did not talk about self abnegation or vicarious living with the same reverence. We are often consumed by what others want for us; advise us; and direct our lives to look like (and what we want for others), that we lack proper focus on knowing and fulfilling our own deep desires. Yes, we owe a responsibility to our families and communities AND we owe a responsibility to ourselves. Being a good global citizen, or a good parent or a good child, is more about learning how to honour your inner truth whilst operating with good values, than it is about self abandonment. This is why, I would love 2019 to be a year of dedicating time to yourself and finding true happiness in your life as you go about living your life in connection with others.

I am not suggesting you stop caring for your family or stop being thoughtful- giving is one of the greatest joys. What I am asking you to consider is, taking time to reconnect with yourself so you can find out what you really want for you. A few ways to achieve this might be:

1. Journalling. Putting pen to paper and just writing out your innermost thoughts has a fantastic way of providing clarity and unearthing any subconscious blocks to your fulfilment. Write about everything from daily struggles and achievements, through to what you loved to do as a child.
2. As part of your  journaling, I suggest that you also keep a gratitude journal- every day write down something that you are grateful for. The more you do this, the more you will be looking for things to be grateful for, changing your outlook from lack to abundance.
3. Write positive affirmations that you can tell yourself throughout the day. Being kind to yourself has countless benefits and having daily mantras to build your self worth will only increase your healthy love of self.
4. Take time to look after yourself – meditate, exercise, eat healthily, laugh, love and spend time in beautiful surroundings .

With these few, relatively simple tasks, you will find that you do not become a more selfish person, instead, you will find that you have more energy to give back to those around you, and you will also increase your capacity to receive love. You will become magnetic!

So what advice would I give my Uber driver? Congratulations for raising 4 adults who still want you in their life. How about you now focus on living your own life, let go of projecting your dreams, take up the guitar and learn Mandarin Chinese yourself? Perhaps also set some healthy boundaries with your children, so they see you as a strong, loving, self-caring woman, and in doing so, you set a fantastic example for them on how to treat themselves.
There are always opportunities for us to grow, let 2019 be the year you grow into more self love, passion and abundance.

 

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I invite you to take action towards your breakthrough to an …
                                                                                  Amazing life and planetary transformation.

Love,
Grace